Mind and Emotional Health ☯

"Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bands and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, every story we're told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us & the ones who don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave & maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe... it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken- hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope." ( He's Just Not That Into You ) 

Q. Are you still in love if the butterflies in your stomach fade? 

"When I first started going out with my boyfriend, the butterflies in my stomach were extremely strong. Now that I know everything about him and feel absolutely comfortable with him, I've noticed that the butterfly feeling has faded away. 

I'm not sure if you need the 'butterfly feeling' to be in love. 

I know you probably don't but I just want to double check. 

For one I'd be devastated and lost without him in my life and that I'd do anything to make him happy. 

I love him so much, but I'm confused about the feeling. Help would be appreciated, thanks (:" 

A. "Love and feelings of love change over time. People feel butterflies in the stomach at the beginnning of love... during the strong attraction and *in love* stage. 

But no one can feel "butterflies" forever. When butterflies go away and you are still comfortable with each other and still want to be together, it may be a sign that your relationship is trying to mature to another level. Stick with each other and work things through as they come up; you might find something deep developing for both of you. 

Good luck." 

        External                                                          Internal      

Major life changes                        Unrealistic expectations, perfectionism 

          Work                                                      Negative self- talk 

Relationship difficulties                                         Pessimism  

Financial problems                               Inability to accept uncertainty 

When a bird is alive.. It eats Ants. 

When the bird is dead.. Ants eat the bird. 

Time and Circumstances can change at any time. 

Don't devalue or hurt anyone in life. 

You may be powerful today. But remember. 

This is more powerful than you! 

One tree makes a million match sticks... 

Only one match stick needed to burn a million trees... 

So be good and do good. 

Let Things Go 

"That is why it is so important to let certain things go. To release them. To cut loose. People need to understand that no one is playing with marked cards; sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Don't expect to get anything back, don't expect recognition for your efforts, don't expect your genius to be discovered or your love to be understood. Complete the circle. Not out of pride, inability or arrogance, but simply because whatever it is no longer fits your life. Close the door, change the record, clean the house, get rid of the dust. Stop being who you were and become to you are." - Paulo Coehlo 

Sometimes bad things will happen, actually, a huge part of life is experiencing bad things. You'll lose family members, you may experience break ups, hell it could just be something like not getting a job after interviewing, but you cannot let that kind of shit bring you down. There's a lot of good shit that can happen too, just don't dwell. 

Go for a walk when it's sunny, or even when it's pouring. Be that one weirdo that's out there getting soaked and laughing, who cares. 

It's not weird to be sad, it's not embarrassing to have a bad day, if you're not feeling happy than be unhappy, but don't let it consume you. Have your moments of sadness and then move on. There will be other relationships after your first messy one, other job opportunities, and just try to remember the good times with passed loved ones, not bad. I know memories aren't as good as a conversation with loved ones, but they're still something. 

Nobody gets a little poop on their fingers when wiping their asses and kills themselves over it. They wash their hands, and move on. That's life, you're a clean hand that might just get some shit on it, but you can overcome it. Find your soapy hot water and bask in it. 

"Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, 'no matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough'. It's going to bed at night thinking, 'yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn't change the truth that I am also brave and worth of love and belonging'." --Brene Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection 

"There is no designated time for anything in your life. You don't have to have your first kiss at any certain time, you don't have to get married in your 20's and you don't have to do anything just because other people think it's best. In fact, you will be much better off if you just do what your heart says. The day you stop caring what other people think is the day their opinions don't mean anything, because you're not there to give them weight." -- 10 Things I Wish I Could Have Told Myself 5 Years Ago 

"And kid, you've got to love yourself. You've got wake up at four in the morning, brew black coffee, and stare at the birds drowning in the darkness of the dawn. You've got to sit next to the man at the train station who's reading your favorite book and start a conversation. You've got to come home after a bad day and burn your skin from a shower. Then you've got to wash all your sheets until they smell of lemon detergent you bought for four dollars at the local grocery store. You've got to stop taking everything so goddamn personally. You are not the moon kissing the black sky. You've got to compliment someones crooked brows at an art fair and tell them that their eyes remind you of green swimming pools in mid July. You've got to stop letting yourself get upset about things that won't matter in two years. Sleep in on Saturday mornings and wake yourself up early on Sunday. You've got to stop worrying about what you're going to tell her when she finds out. You've got to stop over thinking why he stopped caring about you over six months ago. You've got to stop asking everyone for their opinions. Fuck it. Love yourself, kiddo. You've got to love yourself." 

 

If you've ever doubted yourself, walk deep into any forest. Notice how the trees still stand even though they are given no recognition. Walk along any stream. The water still flows, though no one stops to praise it. Watch the stars late at night; they shine without acknowledgement. Humans are just the same. We are made out of the same elements as these beautiful wonders. Always remember your beauty and self worth. 

 

 

 

When you're attached and dependent on something or someone else... it's because you don't feel whole or loved on your own. 

Day 1: Raise Your Consciousness- Pay attention to how you treat yourself compared to how you treat your friends. Mose self- love busters are habits that you can break when you become conscious of them. Habits are those automatic responses you use to respond to situations. You have the power to hurt yourself or make yourself feel better. Which do you prefer? 

 

 

 

 

 

"As a doctor, let me tell you what self-love does:

It improves your hearing, your eyesight, lowers your blood pressure, increases pulmonary function, cardiac output, and helps wiring the musculature. So, if we had a rampant epidemic of self-love then our healthcare costs would go down dramatically. So, this isn't just some little frou-frou new age notion, oh love yourself honey. This is hardcore science."

"I hate to say it, but shit really does happen. You just have to get over it. Beat the hell out of it by doing things that make you happy."